Here I am, staring at the walls and tables in my studio and I feel……blank. I just don’t know where to begin. I know if I dive in and begin to create all of these feelings will go poof. But I just can’t seem to get going. Half of me is so disappointed that my last collection didn’t get “out there” in the big way that I thought it would and should. I feel stymied and pissed all at the same time. I know what I have been creating has a real viable place in the world but the doors are not opening, the connections are not happening. Why is that? I believe in me and my work. It is not a self-confidence thing. So, what is it? The tipping point is not tipping.
On the flip side, I am extremely well supported through family and friends.I have made some incredible new friends and thanks to technology I can jump right into their worlds everyday. I spend my days differently now. I get out, have coffee, interact a bit more. I don’t seem to be living in quite the vacuum that I was before. I’m putting myself out there. But I look around this studio and freak. I always joke that I have 500 days of wearable jewelry scattered about the tables. Do I need to make more? No. Do I want to? Of course. My sanity lies in being able to express myself through my work. Catch 22? I can get out but I can’t get my work out? Lots to ponder while I stare!